


Baby, It's The End

by ahunterandhisangel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Drug Use, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-06
Updated: 2013-11-06
Packaged: 2017-12-31 15:36:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1033372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ahunterandhisangel/pseuds/ahunterandhisangel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel is tired of Dean's ways in the 2014!endverse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Baby, It's The End

Looking at Cas now, you would never know that he used to be an Angel of the Lord. His new, rugged appearance, courtesy of the apocalypse, was far from angelic. Not to mention all of the heavenly magic he used to be able to do vanished along with his Grace, and with the loss of his Grace, also came the loss of his mind, and the loss of the things he found important. He mostly gave up his mind when you think about it, surrendering it to the demons he now carried. 

Drugs and alcohol came into his life at the wrong time; he was graceless, the Croatoan virus was ravaging the planet, and Lucifer was wearing Sam, the only human, besides Dean, that he had grown to love. 

Dean probably played the biggest part in Cas’s slow ascent into addiction, though he would never tell him that. While the apocalypse was happening outside their door, Cas spent his waking thoughts worrying about Dean; “Dean, I brought you some food,” “Dean, when was the last time you slept,” “Dean, I know you miss Sam, I miss him too.” As hard as Cas tried, he couldn’t pull Dean from his slump. 

As Cas drowned his depression in formerly illegal substances, Dean held his in and sealed it with a padlock, creating a canyon sized gap between the two men. 

As each day passed at Camp Chitaqua, their time together became scarcer. Dean established himself as the camp’s fearless leader, taking over the many duties to ensure safety from the Croats. This required Dean to be up on his feet the majority of the day, leaving Cas to his own devices in the larger than normal cabin that they shared. Cas usually spent this alone time, taking different cocktails of narcotics, or, drinking until he couldn’t stand. Sometimes Chuck would visit him and they would share a joint, while reminiscing about the “good-ole-days”, when the Winchesters were at their finest. 

The rare nights that Dean stayed with Cas in the cabin didn’t amount to much. He would crawl into bed right away, not saying much to the other man. Cas would ask about his day, receiving a few short answers before Dean would make it clear that he didn’t want to talk anymore. 

Cas would crawl into bed next to him, snuggling in close to the man’s chest, squeezing his eyes shut as tightly as possible. When Cas wasn’t looking into those hardened emerald green eyes, it was easy for him to pretend that nothing was wrong, and to make himself believe that this version of Dean still cared for him. 

They would stay like that, with Dean planting feather-soft kisses on the smaller man’s sleeping form, until the sun came up. With the first sliver of sunshine to peek through the cabin’s window, Dean was up and out the door, pressing one last kiss to the sleeping man’s lips. 

Cas would wake up, immediately missing the warmth he had clung to throughout the night. He would lay in bed a little longer on these mornings, breathing in Dean’s scent that still lingered on the bed, and trying not to think about the passionate nights they used to share before the world went to shit. Thinking of those nights only made Cas yearn for the old Dean, and a bottle of Valium. 

Eventually, he would force himself to get up and go about his normal routine of drugs, helping with chores around the camp, and then back to his cabin for more drugs. When it was clear that Dean wouldn’t be returning for the night, he’d break out the old bottle of whiskey he’d found on a supply run, drinking until he fell asleep, face buried in Dean’s pillow. 

Dean hadn’t been back to their cabin in two weeks when Cas decided he was done. He poured shot after shot, angrily thinking about the man he loved. As much as Cas understood that Dean had a big responsibility as leader, he also knew that it wasn’t the only thing keeping his lover away. There had to be someone else, probably Risa since she worked around Dean a lot, but there were a lot of other females in the camp that Dean from five years prior would have been attracted to in a heartbeat. Cas never believed that his lover had fully come to terms with his sexuality; whenever someone at the camp would even mention it, they would get an earful of, “I’m not gay, it’s just Cas, and it’s none of your fucking business where I put my dick and where I don’t,” which usually ended with Dean stomping off in a fit with Cas trailing lazily behind him. Cas realized he wouldn’t be surprised if he found Dean in the arms of a woman, and that thought had him refilling his glass. As Cas sat there in the all too large cabin, taking drink after drink, he realized what he had to do. 

Cas stumbled out of the cabin, visibly inebriated, and began to look for the hunter with the striking green eyes that he had given up everything for, the hunter he had still managed to love whole heartedly, but found nothing.

“Where is he?” Cas shouted at Chuck from across the small street, as he leaned against the wall of the meeting cabin, so his spinning head wouldn’t cause him to collapse. 

Chuck started across the gravel towards the obviously drunk man, “Where is who, Cas? Are you okay?” Chuck moved his hand to steady Cas, but Cas pushed him away. 

“Who do you fucking think?” He snapped, placing his forehead against the wooden wall as vomit rose in the former angel’s throat. 

“Cas, I think we should get you-“

“Where is Dean, Chuck? That’s all I want to know!” 

Cas lost the fight with the vomit he was trying to hold back and was soon heaving onto Chuck’s feet, “What the fuck, Cas?” 

Chuck moved away, pulling his shoes off carefully to avoid the other man’s puke, before saying, “I’ll go find Dean,” and running off down the street. 

Cas’s body decided that it had enough and he found himself collapsing right there in a pile of his own vomit.


End file.
